Letters Galore!

This last week i received 3 letters from Caleb! he has started writing me every day, even though he is incredibly busy with what little time he gets to himself every day. Getting letters more often is definitely helping this be a little easier on me :). The last letter i received was from the 20th, so i'm all caught up with what is happening except for this last week. He said that on the 17th he went to sick call because he has been so sick and it has been affecting training, but luckily its just a cold and they gave him medicine. He has already felt a lot of improvement since then! A young soldier died at Ft Jackson this last week from pneumonia, so i was relieved to hear that his illness was nothing too serious. Apparently his Company finally phased up to White Phase on the 19th! i had heard that they were having a rough time because so many of them were sick, but apparently they all pulled it together and they're now in their rifle phase! Caleb said he has an M16 he has to carry around everywhere and it weighs about 10 lbs. They got some new privileges with White Phase, like getting more time to eat, getting to ride the bus to church, and his favorite, getting to sing Cadence during Marches instead of  the usual left, right, left. Nothing too impressive, but priveldges are privileges, and he enjoys them :). I am hopeful for another letter tomorrow updating me on more! I try not to get too hopeful, but its hard not to some days.

Deanna and i got our reservations made for a hotel for graduation, and got a rental car reserved. We are getting very excited now that all the plans are being made. I'm supposed to be getting the Graduation Packet from Ft Jackson soon, and i'm excited to know all the information! i've been told they usually send them 30 days before graduation, and that last month will be starting in a little over a week! Can't wait for that final count down to start!

I have started buying things for our little Connor. I've only got the big things, because my Visiting Teachers are going to throw me a baby shower this next month, and they want to do it before i buy everything. So far i got his crib and changing table, and his bedding for the crib, and his stroller and car seat. but that's it :) i'm trying to remind myself that i still have two months, but time is going by so fast that i want to get it all ready!!! i suppose i'm starting to get just a little bit excited :). i'm probably going to sign up for a birthing class for this next month, and i'm going to go and tour the hospital i will be giving birth at. It's time for me to start making plans and it makes the end of this pregnancy seem like its flying by a million times faster than the beginning did!

An Update

I received a phone call from Caleb this Tuesday! It was a short call, about 5 minutes, but it was exactly what i needed! He didn't say much because he is sick, but he told me he is starting to recuperate and feel better, and that it won't be keeping him from graduating on time. :) Apparently there is a nasty flu bug going around his plt, and some people have come down with pneumonia. He said not to worry though, and that other than that he is doing well. And he told me he has sent me three letters recently, one of which i got yesterday in the mail! :) He apologized for not writing often enough, and i felt bad because i think i whined too much in my letters and made him feel guilty. i really need to work on that one! He told me that he did the Gas Chamber and that it was horrible, but i didn't get much details from him because he is so worn out from being sick. And i have also heard that they have just began White Phase! i didn't hear that from him, i heard it through the grapevine, but I'm pretty sure it is the truth. He is nearly 1/3 of the way done with BCT! Deanna and i bought our pane tickets for Graduation today! We're planning on making the remainder of the reservations this next week sometime so that we make sure to get what we want at a good rate. I'm very excited about it all. :)

I have been considering putting in my two week notice at work, but i decided last night to ask my Manager if we can cut back on my hours, and make it so that no one can pull me to other areas besides my own instead. I don't really want to stop working, i just can't handle it the way things are going right now. Something has to change, so i might as well try and see if they're willing before i quit. If they are willing to work with my request, then I'll continue to work up until my trip to Caleb's Graduation the beginning of April. If not, I'll be done by March. So, it looks like i will have to see what she says about it tonight at work.  I like having a job to keep my busy. but i also need some time to do the things that i need to do, and its hard not having Caleb here. So, I'm just going to have to see if they're willing to give-a-little to get-a-little.

Enduring On

This isn't fun. And it's not easy. I've gotten two letters... one on my birthday that was two sentences, and the other a few days before that. He sounds happy, but i just wish the mail didn't take so long! i mailed off his third package of letters today. I'm hoping he's recieved the first one by now. Patience is unfortunately not a quality i possess. The days drag by, and I try to remind myself to wait for a phone call or a letter, and not to be upset when they don't come. I know he is busy, and i KNOW that phone calls are a priveledge you have to earn. It's just not easy, and its not fun.

But, on the plus side, my Doctor has said that she will allow me to graduation in april! i'm cutting it really close, so i'm hoping and praying nothing happens to postpone it or i will be to far along in the pregnancy to be allowed to fly. I have started planning with Deanna, so that we can purchase tickets and make arrangements ASAP. i haven't recieved any information about it, everything i know i have found out by being a horrible stalker on the fort jackson page and the 3-34 facebook page! but i'm sure thats exactly what they are there for.

Caleb has been assigned to E Company 1st Platoon of the 3rd Battalion, 34th Infantry Regiment, 165th BDE at Fort Jackson, South Carolina. As far as i know he is loving it, and everything he gets to do. I got the chance to see some pictures of his company at Victory Tower were they got to climb on ropes and all sorts of stuff. I have receieved word that they are starting First Aid and Land Navigation, and getting to go to the field now. I'm sure Caleb is doing wonderfully at it all. They call this part of training "Red Phase". It last until week three, and then he moves to White Phase, and three weeks after that is Blue Phase, then after that finally Graduation. It sounds like a long tiring process to me, but i know he is 100% optimistic about it all, he was so excited before he left to start it all! Lets just hope i can stay as optimistic as he is!

The Start of Something New

Well, Caleb is gone. Gone, gone, gone. And yes I'm being a perfect cry baby over it. But what kind of wife would i be if i wasn't? He left early yesterday morning and reported to MEPS at 05:45. i wished he had been a little more solemn about the whole thing... but i suppose i can't blame him for being a little excited, i mean, he HAS wanted to do this for years. He called me from the aiport about a quarter to 12, and i was so excited to hear from him that i didn't even ask questions. He said he was safe, and would be flying to Georgia and having a two hour layover before going on to South Carolina. i was hoping he would call again from Georgia, but he didn't. :( I tried very hard not to be a cry baby at work, and in my opinion, it was a huge improvement from what it was when my dad was gone. yes i did cry, and have cried multiple times, but i can atleast get out a smile occasionally and i'm stilll thinking positive about life. I miss him horribly already, but am writing him a letter each night before bed, and i think that will help to keep me sane. Jess and i have all sorts of plans to keep us busy, and i'm hoping it will help me to be not quite so lazy! Jess was so sweet and took pictures of us together the night before he left, so i'm hoping to be posting them soon. I've got a long list of things i am going to try to improve on while he is gone, and while we are waiting for little Connor to arrive. I had to go into the Doctor's today to take my glucose test, and i'm pretty confidant that there will be no problems. Poor Minda is having such a hard time with her pregnancy, and didn't pass either test, and now has Gestational Diabetes. I suppose we should have expected it since this pregnancy has been so hard on her... but she was very sad about it. I don't think i could handle having a problem like that while Caleb is gone... its all so different for me, and i miss him and miss sharing all the moments with him, but i know its a good thing that he is doing, and its what he wants to do. I am very sad that i will not be allowed to go to his graduation, due to the fact that i will be so close to full term. Most airlines won't let me fly that close, and i doubt my doctor would let me go without putting up a fight. And besides that, Caleb told me as much as he wants me there, he would feel better knowing his baby and wife are safe on the ground. So, as much as i am dying to go, i will respect his wishes and stay here and not risk complicating the pregnancy. I will just continue to write each day, and whenever i get a letter back i will be over joyed! i don't have his address yet, but that is not stopping me from writing every day until i get it. then i will just have to send him a whole bunch all at once! We are hopeful that this will be a good experience for both of us, even though it is extremely hard, and such a new thing for us.... but hey, sometimes the things that are hardest, are what mean the most to you in the end.

The Start of a New Year

Well, it has been a while since i wrote because we have been busy busy busy! Now that the holidays are over life has started to calm down a bit and i can find some spare time to write. Our Christmas felt strange because there was no snow, no cold, and no loud crazy siblings. We slept in. Made a fancy dinner with turkey and mashed potatoes and gravy. and laid around relaxing until the evening. We didn't open our presents until around 7ish that night. But we did enjoy opening them together and took pictures. We ate dinner and filled our tummies to the brim! then we snuggled and watch christmas movies. i missed my family so much, but Caleb kept reminding me only a few more days til i see them!!! the three days passed quickly and before i knew it we were headed to the airport in a taxi. Day 1- the airport was much larger than boise's and i was glad we didn't attempt to drive ourselves and get lost. i hadn't been on a plane since i was 12 so i was kind of nervous to see how it would go, but it wasn't bad at all. my only problem was the flight to Vegas because i got hungry so i was feeling very sick and nauseous, and then the taking off and landing and moving around didn't sit so well with my already sick feeling tummy! but Caleb got some food into me, so the flight to Boise i rather enjoyed. on our way to Vegas i got so confused because our iteniery said it was only a 10 min flight, but it felt like WAY longer! but when we landed the time was only 10:35, which was right on schedule. we didn't remember the time change until we got a txt message that said "sent at 11:35 recieved at 10:35". then we laughed and laughed and i didn't feel so stupid. i KNEW it had to be longer than just 10 minutes! i was so excited to see my family i nearly cried. i didn't get to sit with caleb on the flight to boise but i was across the aisle from him. Connor kept kicking me and it made me giggle, i probably looked like a crazy person, but i don't even care lol. It was cloudy on the flight so i didn't even look out the window until we were descending over Boise. i was so excited to see familiar territory!!! When my family picked us up we went straight home, and exchanged christmas presents. my brothers seemed happy with our choice of game for them! then we went over to see Caleb's mom and sisters. Caleb had promised to fix her computer, so we wanted to get started with that before we went to Pinetop. Day 2 - our Pinetop adventure started! we weren't intimidated by the snow, and i was so excited to see how much of it there was! we were the first ones up there, and Caleb was so sweet and helped to unload everything of everyones when they arrived. We went out in the snow for a little while, but it was up to our knees and no trails had been made so even a short walk was exhausting for me. But Bethy and me had an awesome time falling on our faces, and at one point we were even crawling on our hands and knees so we didn't keep having out feet fall through the snow! Oh and i forgot to mention the best part.... the power was out!!! there was so much snow that all of Idaho City had no power, and the water was off too. that means no toilets!!! we had to use this itty bitty porta-potty shack that was up this hill. i definently did NOT enjoy that part. the power finally came back on in the middle of the night, and i had given in and just used the toilets and flushed them when the power came back on. i was not about to go outside at that time of night to pee!!!! Day 3- i was reluctant to go out in the snow til the sun came out, so Beth and i spent some time holding Weston! He's such a cute baby, and it is weird to think in a year i will have my own little boy! he's a May baby too, so in a year he'll be the same age Weston is! When we went out on the snow we bundled up warm, and Caleb took me on the snowmobile. then Bethy took everyone, and i think Caleb was surprised with her craziness lol it was fun to watch! i did the tiniest bit of sledding. no bumps and a totol of maybe 10 feet. i was very careful, but i was glad i got to. i took pictures! got an awesome one of caleb going off a jump, and one of Beth falling off! her feet are up in the air and it makes me laugh lol. after a while we got cold and went back inside. We played some games with all the cousins and had a grand old time. Day 4 - we packed up all out stuff and cleaned and loaded the truck. Dad was going to get us home by 2 because we had plans at 3. he got us home right on time. We went to lunch with Natalie and her boyfriend Kenneth. they are very cute together and i won't be surprised if they get married! We ended up going to TacoTime, and the double date didn't end as well as it started thanks to me and my big fat mouth. :( the details aren't necessary, but all i will say is don't gossip no matter who you're with or where... because you never know who is going to hear it. not fun. :(. after our double, we went over to Deanna's house where she and the girls had a new years party planned. we spent the night there. we watched How to Train Your Dragon, but i fell asleep and Caleb took me to bed. they watched the ball drop, then went to bed too. Day 5- in the morning we had a nice fancy breakfast. then we did haircuts on the girls and got ready for the day. We had lunch with Tabby and her fiance Jon, then hot chocolate with Malynn! it was a wonderful day, and i'm so glad we got to see so many of our friends! oh, and something awesome happened! Lindsey got engaged!!! she sent a txt that morning, so i called her to get all the details. i'm so excited for her and Brenen!! the wedding is being planned for April 23rd. Later Deanna took us to see Tangled in the new movie theater by my parent's house! it was such an awesome movie!!!  when we finished that we had a yummy turkey dinner with them, and went back to mom's and dad's. Day 6- we got to go to church with mom and dad, and because it was textimony meeting i decided to get up and bear my testimony! it went wonderfully, and i'm glad i did. it was sooooo fun seeing old friends and catching up! After church we had a wonderful meal as a family, and i got to talk to Minda on the phone for a bit. Bethy came over and spent the night! i was glad i got to see her so much while we were both in town! Day 7 - i wanted to do a hair day while i was there, so monday was the day we choose. i sent Caleb  off to spend time with his dad, and i got busy doing colors and a perm! and Becca came over and hung out! i was so glad to see her and and hear how she is doing!!! Lindsey stopped by for a bit too and showed off her gorgeous ring! We got all the hair done we needed to except the boys haircuts, which i saved for after dinner. Beth and I went to meet Caleb at his dad's house for dinner. It was a little awkward, but he seemed to be on his best behavior so it wasn't too bad. After dinner we went to Deanna's for one last fixing of the computer. apparantly it really didn't want to work... so it was trashed. :( i had to do 3 haircuts still, so we went back to my parent's and i quickly did my daddy's and brother's. Day 8 - Jess got the job of taking up to the airport! we also took Beth to her grandma's house, since her flight didn't leave until later that afternoon. i felt bad cuz we got poor jessie lost! but we got there on time, and were able to sit together on the flight thanks to a kind man how gave up his seat so we could sit together. :) he was so kind. i cried a bit in the airport because i was so sad to leave.... but after we got home i was ok. we did laundry, and i was so glad we'd left the house clean! Ever since we have been busy with work and the list of things we need to get done before Caleb leaves in 2 1/2 weeks! jessie will be here in a week and we're very excited :). our next doctor's appointment is monday, so keep on the lookout for updates!!!

Boy, oh Boy!

Well, it's a boy! We had the big ultrasound today and its was plain as day, no mistaking, that our little one is most definently a he. i was slighly disappointed, and cried a tiny bit, but i soon reconciled myself to the idea that boys are just as fun, even if they don't get the cutsey stuff or frills! everything is looking great, and as far as they could tell there were no problems to be seen. his heart rate was 143, and he was right on track with size! he was so cute and kept turning away from the camera and covering his little face. and he was moving all over the place! several times she told us "he sure is a feisty one!" and "thats a stubborn boy you got" when she was trying to get his attention so he would face the camera for a good picture. what a little cutie! minda is very excited that her little boy will have a bestest cousin just like we both had  growing up! i should have expected it to be that way, cuz it just fits. perfect arrangement! i suppose someone up there had it all planned out that way. :)

we are sooooo excited to go to idaho in two weeks!!!!! its pretty much all i talk about besides our little sweetheart! can't wait to see my mommy and daddy and my family and cousins!!!!!! we want to make the most of the trip since Caleb's BCT date got moved up. :( it is now january 24th instead of february 28th. i really hate when the military pulls that on me!!! i keep telling myself "the sooner he leaves, the sooner he comes back!" but i am still slightly bitter that they took 5 weeks away from me that i was planning on having! now i will have to pick out all the baby stuff all by myself! but atleast he will get home 5 weeks sooner now, and will get to spend more time with our little Conner! oh, we've picked the name Conner Scott Barthlome! :) i forgot to mention that part. i'm still kinda giddy with excitement and my brain is lost somewhere lol. we are hoping that our trip home will be a good break before he leaves. it hasn't quite sunked into me yet that i only have 5-6 weeks left with him, but i think it will hit me hard once january comes. i'm just hoping i handle it ok. everyone at work has been very kind, and offering to let me hang out with them and do anything i need. its very nice. and Jessie may come stay with me for a little while! and many of my dearest friends (cousins included) have offered to come visit me for a little while so i don't get so lonely! it makes me feel very loved to know they would consider doing that for me! i truly am one lucky girl to have the life i've been given! an amazing husband, wonderful friends, a fantastic family, and my own precious little baby on the way! why do i complain so much about my life, when i have been blessed with so many wonderful things????

Holiday Crazies

I don't think I've ever fully realized how crazy it gets during the holidays!!! This year has cured me of any naive assumptions that the holidays are all relaxation and fun. Now that thanksgiving is over, i don't think it has any intention of slowing down until after new years is over. ugh. working in retail has definitely opened my eyes to the holiday rush. Working Black Friday was QUITE the experience. why is it that everyone is so focused on themselves during the holidays, instead of wanting to spread the holiday cheer???? i just find it completely wacko.

I was lucky enough to get Thanksgiving day off, and so Caleb and i made ourselves a delicious feast, including a turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, corn, and pumpkin pie! i would say it was definitely a success. i felt bad because Caleb did most of the cooking.... but it tasted sooooo yummy! he is definitely a better cook then i am. Caleb's mom sent us pictures of the girls and her, and i got to call my mom and talk to her and my sisters. Deanna and the girls went to Cascade and stayed in a hotel and went out for thanksgiving dinner, and my family did their own yummy meal this year since Melinda and Mitchell and Jess were all there. Then they went out to Middleton for dessert and family time with Dad's side of the family. i hope it was fun for them! it made me very homesick, and made me miss my cousins! I had decided that i wanted to go at midnight to Walmart for their Black Friday sales, and all i can say is that it was definitely an adventure; the first and probably last time for a long while. people were CRAZY!!!! we didn't get very much stuff, but we stayed within our budget and got some nice presents that we needed. i am making us wrap them up and put them under our tree! oh and i forgot to mention that we put it up! i begged Caleb to let us put it up after we ate our feast, and because he loves me so much, we did. :) i was very happy about it, and sent my family a picture when it was done! they put theirs up yesterday, and sent us a picture and it made me very homesick. that's the first year i have ever missed out on it! :( but, i am definitely counting down the days until we get to go on our trip to Idaho!!!! only one more month! and Beth is coming too from Utah so i will get to spend time with her and we will all be together at Pinetop! I'm very excited about it. it should be alot of fun.

We went to our third doctor's appointment this week, and now have a date for when we will find out the gender of the baby! December 15th is the date! we will be 18 1/2 weeks then, and we are SO excited about it! everything is coming along just as it should, and i even got my weight up a bit (so proud of myself!). i don't get nauseous anymore, unless something really gross happens, or i get way too hungry or extremely tired. we got to hear the babies heart beat too! it was 140 something.... i didn't hear exactly, but Caleb said it was 140something lol. he is still determined that it is a girl. i am worried he will be disappointed :(. the doctor said it was a good strong heartbeat and everything on the ultrasound was looking good. it had its cute little hand covering its face like it was saying "please no pictures!" hehe i thought to myself "awww just like its mommy! a little camera-shy cutie pie!" at out next appointment they will spend about 45 min checking every little detail on the baby and making sure there is no problems or deformities. I'm so excited to see it upclose!!!! i love my baby already. Caleb is one proud papa! he is sooooo good to us, and is always making sure we are comfortable and have everything we need.

Caleb had his first drill this last weekend! he came home sore and tired, but happy. i am glad he is still enjoying his decision. the second day they got to go paint balling and learn some battle techniques, and he was very proud of himself for only dying once out of the four times they played. silly boy. i missed him, but i am proud of him.

We are trying to enjoy all the time that we get to spend together this holiday season, and just make good memories. i am determined to weed out all the drama in my life, cuz i really have more important things to focus on right now, and so far I've already made big improvements. its nice to feel more peaceful and happy inside when I'm not constantly stressed and worrying about unnecessary dramas! there is enough craziness going on in this season without me adding all the pointless stuff too it! the holidays may be crazy, but its definitely worth it in the end :).